Trap and Release

I e-mailed my lurking kitty problem to my cat writers list-serv and was informed I need to do a trap and release. This consists of my buying or borrowing a humane trap, baiting it, catching kitty, taking kitty to vet and paying for a spay or neuter (also checking to see if the cat is nursing, indicating kittens are present) and then releasing.  That is my task for the weekend then--finding a trap and instigating Operation Big-Ass Kitty Catch.

I was feeling a little "grrrrr" yesterday about the situation. It's not stressful, but it's just one more thing to add to the list, you know? Then I received an e-mail from a writer colleague I've met at annual Cat Writer's conferences. A somewhat shy woman with a huge heart and passion for saving animals and she-doesn't-even-know-how-good-she-is writing skills.

She's dealing with an incredibly heart-wrenching and painful situation regarding some cats she's trying to convince the city to rescue from a homeless man. He carries them around in locked containers on his bike and while he might feed them, the cats are suffering from being cramped, have urine scalds on their legs and have to rest in their own feces. No one is listening to her and she has been told in annoyance by more than one cop and city official, "Lighten up, lady. They're just cats." You can read the full story here: http://www.petsweekly.com/Stories/Hostages.html.

I admire the work of the woman who wrote this. I won't go into details because they're too horrifying to mention, but she rescues cats that have been abused and tortured. There are some sick f---ing people out there in the world who like to take out their aggression on innocent animals. I don't have the stomach or mental strength to deal with even once what she deals with on a regular basis. Thank God there are people like her in the world, willing to do what the rest of us shield our eyes from.

Everyone please say a prayer for the cats suffering in the above story.

Microsoft Needs Some Work in the Customer Service Area

I hate calling computer people. I feel stupid and intimidated before the call is even connected. They ask questions about versions and models and upgrades that I have no idea how to answer. But I needed my e-mail problem fixed and Microsoft's lines closed at 6 PM, so I sucked up my courage yesterday at 5:40 and called.

First there was the litany of "press this button" options. I don't have as big as problem with that as some people do. If a problem can be handled by pressing a 1, 3, 9 combination, fine by me. But I could just barely decipher the initial offerings. I listened twice and finally figured out I was supposed to press "1."

Then I got a second list of options, depending if I was a home or commercial account, if I wanted installation or upgrade information. At no point ever did any semblance of words such as "for questions on Outlook, press '5,' come across the line.  I randomly pressed another button and was taken to a third level list. By this time I'd been on the phone about 2 minutes. Now they were giving me instructions that if I wanted to talk to a rep, I should have my version and model numbers accessible and informed me I could likely access this information by opening the program and clicking on "About." Wonder of wonders, it worked.

I was then very excited to hear a live female voice on the phone. Without asking why I was calling, she asked me to spell my first and last name. Then I gave her my zip code and e-mail. Then she asked what program I was calling about. "Outlook," I said proudly.

"Which version?"

"Outlook Express 6," I said, sure she would be impressed with my following instructions. Then we went through who the product was registered to, I read her the 20 (not making that up--20) digit version code.  Then she asked me what type computer I had only she didn't phrase it like that. It was more like, "And what system is the program operating on?" I finally figured out that she needed to hear "Sony."

Then and only then did she ask the reason for my call. "I'm having problems sending attachments," I said. 

"You have three options," she said. "You may request to be connected to one of our technicians at a minimal charge of $59 for consultation. You may access our website and our help FAQ page to determine the problem yourself. Or you may..."

I don't remember what the third option was. I was too incensed about the $59 charge. I know what I wanted to tell her my third option to her should be though.

That's it. I told her fine, I'd go to the website. "Is there any other issue you would like to bring to our attention today?" she intoned.

Other than the fact that your company is a customer relations nightmare and I'd like to stick that script you're reading up your a--, no, thanks. Nothing comes to mind.

I talked to a computer guy in my leads group today who shed some light on the subject. Road Runner, as Blair discovered, won't allow you to send an -mail containing over 2 MB attachment. When I asked why zipping the file didn't work, he said while Word documents have "fluff" inside them and can be compacted, pdf files can typically be only minimally reduced. I wish I had called Rob to start with.

I've never been one to bash Microsoft. I don't keep up with technology enough to know if they're innovative, evil, or what the deal is.  But one thing I know for sure. Their customer service skills are sorely, sorely lacking.

I'll Take A Pass on the Passwords

Do you ever feel like your entire life is password protected? It's becoming increasingly difficult to do anything in life that doesn't require a "unique" password, 2 picture-card identity's, and the promise of your first born's blood.

I suspect there are more people out there who, like me, now keep an entire Excel spreadsheet devoted entirely to passwords (of course, my Excel spreadsheet is itself password protected).  Off the top of my head, I need passwords for:

• My blog
• Online banking
• Netfirms
• Amazon
• Guru.com
• My many book clubs so I can go online each month and reject the book of the month (only to have it sent to me anyway)
• Consumer Reports
• Travelocity
• American Express / Hilton Honors cards
• Mary Kay online ordering
• Staples
• Paypal
• Best Buy
• Yahoo
• MSN groups
• Roadrunner
• Carolina Red Cross
• And last but not least, different pin passwords for my ATM cards--one for business, one for personal, one for debit, one for credit card, etc., etc. The only reason I have any money in these accounts is because all my time is spent unsuccessfully trying to remember passwords to get it out...
  

People--there just aren't enough number/letter combos in the Universe. Or if there are, I have no shot at remembering them. Every new website that insists I log in my e-mail and password before proceeding takes care to warn me to "Chose a minimum 35-number/letter password that bears no relation to your kids, spouse, pets, home address, or anything that has remotely to do with your life and that you therefore have a shot at remembering."

PLUS, they go on to warn you that you should never reuse a password, i.e., the secret code that lets you buy books on Amazon should be entirely different from the secret code used to access your Paypal account. You betcha. Like I don't have enough useless crap floating around in my head without trying to remember if my password for my bank is "CatsRule225" or "Rulerof allcats522." 

Here's a heads up: I have 2 passwords--same letters, same numbers--that I use for almost all my transactions. Crack the code and you have instant access to every corner of my life.  I have no shame in admitting this because I'm willing to bet large sums of money (that I can't access from my account b/c I lost the damn password) that most people do the same.

The using the same code things is fairly recent. I tried to play by the rules for awhile and use different passwords, which is why I am forced to keep the Excel spreadsheet.  I will say this: looking at old passwords is like reading a diary... you can really tell what headspace you were in during that period of your life. "menaremorons07" (note: different from "MENAREMORONS07") and "pookiekissypoo1" are enough to keep your shrink busy for months.

If you ever read about my arrest in the paper, it won't be for drugs, or money laundering, or staging an animal rights protest. No, it will most likely be for bank robbery... because I was unable to ever come up with that stupid password. 

PookiekissyPoo1 out. 

Unfinished Business

Blair and I had breakfast on Sunday with a couple we're good friends with whose schedule mirrors ours in terms of sheer chaos.  The discussion turned to long-term planning and as a group, we all laughed aloud. Long term planning? It's a race to get through each day and get done what absolutely, positively has to be done that day. Who has time for long-term planning?

And yet without it, life stagnates and you  find yourself in a whirling circle, chasing your own tail but never moving forward.  I'll take the time now and again to write out some long-range goals or dreams and the steps to take me there and sometimes I'll follow the plan, but more typical is that the project of the moment rears its head and I turn my attention and energies to that instead. (And there is always a new project or issue rearing its head).

I'm not sure what the answer is. Blair and I are "watching" life at the moment to see if this has just been an unusually full two months or if the pattern of only seeing each other 20 minutes a day is more of a permanent issue that needs addressed.  What do you do if it is a problem? Work less? Turn down work? I have that option but Blair doesn't.  And since I like my work and only take on projects that interest me, I'm not sure turning down work is the answer.

 I have disengaged myself from several groups which I'm hoping will clear time. I've dropped 2 writers groups and Dale Carnegie ends in 4 weeks so that will free up Tuesday nights as well.  Leaving the writers groups not only frees up drive time and meeting time but also the time required to do the prep work to be ready to meet with the group. The trick now is not to take on anything new.

If I ever do clear some free time, here are a few projects I'd like to see completed: 

• Update my website - Need to add new book cover, new book page, new headshot photos, possibly overhaul the entire site and lose the maniac kitty-cat at the typewriter or at least move him back to a humor or pets page.
• Wash windows. We have 42 windows, each 16-paned, so this is no small task. But I love looking out sparkling clean windows and ours are approaching the point where the cats are going to start writing "WASH ME" in the dirt.
  
• Hang pictures.  We managed to have them framed, now need to find a home for them.
• Paint the exercise room. The exercise room has the same duck (yes, duck) border it had when we moved in and I've been ready to make it go away for years. However, that means scraping wallpaper, moving heavy exercise equipment, and a large time investment.
  
• Re-polyurethane the wood floors.  Not something I'm looking forward to. I've avoided it for 11 years and I hate to ruin such a strong record.
• Decorate for Halloween. This includes set building as we are "the" house for trick-or-treaters. We do themes every year and now have a reputation we feel obliged to live up to as being the "cool" house on the block--at least at Halloween. We're thinking of building a bridge and doing the Headless Horseman theme this year.
  
• Pull out winter clothes and pack summer clothes away. Once I get cold enough, I'll do this.
• Play more with the cats.  The guilt increases as I too often ignore them.
• Spend more time with Blair. (Goes without saying)
• Finish final draft work on public speaking book and get to critique group.
• Organize scrapbook. The papers and souvenirs from England/Scotland remain piled in a bag, crying to be sorted out.
• Visit friends. A close friend of mine moved back to Durham from DC almost 4 months ago and I haven't been able to find a weekend yet when I'm free to go see her.

There's a host of other things but I'm feeling slightly nauseas just looking at this list, so we'll leave it alone. Although, I'm a bit encouraged too. This was the first morning in months that I didn't have to be up at 5 AM. I slept in until 6 and it was heavenly. Since the festival was rained out this weekend, I got the house cleaned and we completed a few household tasks we'd been putting off. Had breakfast with friends on Sunday. Went for a 50-minute run yesterday. Am meeting friends for dinner before Dale Carnegie today.

I almost feel like I have an actual life going on again. 

Lovely.