Schedule F--- Up

For priding myself on being such an organized individual, I can really step in it at times. I belong to a writers group that meets weekly to write and then we take turns hosting quarterly meetings at each others homes. I was in charge of the meeting for the first quarter of this year. Through a loooong series of mishaps (people out of town, a literary event cancelled due to snow, etc.) we never managed to meet.  After innumerable e-mail exchanges (you try coordinating the schedules of 8 busy individuals), we finally picked May 9th for our dinner. I sent out directions, people confirmed, we were set.

Until...

My mom called last week to say that she would be in DC over Mother's Day weekend. Her best friends nephew is graduating and the dad of the nephew is paying for the trip there.  Mom didn't realize that I'm only 5 hours from DC, and was thrilled when I said I could drive up to meet her. I, of course, not letting the fact that I'm hosting a dinner for 8 on Friday stop me from booking a non-refundable hotel room in DC on the same night.

I just realized my goof last night. There is nothing to do but cancel the dinner--which has been cancelled about six times before. I'm hoping someone else will open their home and the dinner can go on as planned. I'm just so embarrassed. It's such a tacky thing to do last minute.  But then again, I rarely see my mom.

Never, ever assume you can "remember" what's on your calendar. Look where it got me...

Gettin' Girly

I'm not a girly-girl. My idea of a fun evening out NEVER involves having my hair and nails done, slipping on a ball gown, and wearing sparkly eye shadow. I hate shopping for clothes. I cave in to my husband's urging to wear comfortable versus stylish shoes.

Still. I go in stages where I have the urge to pretty myself up a bit. I'm entering one of these stages now. I know because I highlighted my hair on Wednesday. And while I was waiting for my stylist, I flipped through a beauty magazine and read with great interest how a few fake eyelashes at the outer corners of the eye can add drama and effect. I'm heading to CVS today to get me some of those. (Prepare for a forthcoming blog on how I had to call 911 to remove eyelash glue from my eyes.)

I went to a book signing last night for my friend and fellow GSO author, Quinn Dalton.  I found myself paying attention to what the women were wearing.  And the fact that most women had their nails done. I gave up on nail polish years ago. I do so much typing on the computer that I can't make a polish job last even a day. But I admit... I was feeling "less then" because my my poor little nails were naked.

I blame TV. Watch an old episode of "Friends" or "Desperate Housewives" and check out the $2000 outfits these women lay about the house in.  At the moment, I have the urge to hit the stores and buy new clothes so I can feel pretty sitting at my desk. However... is that really necessary? Does it make sense to pay $150 for a blouse and wear it around the house where likely no one will see it and--knowing me--there's a good chance I'll spill something on it during the course of the day?

But I'm in girl-mode. I want padded bras, matching silk underwear, new eye shadow combinations, chunky jewelry, oversized rings, high heels, glossy lips, extra-conditioned hair, skirts, floral prints, and six different ways of styling my hair. I want it... and I want it now.

This too shall pass, and I will return to my normal mode of jeans and my "dress up" pink t-shirt. And hopefully the phase will pass before I spend too much money. To begin, I'll satisfy myself with a little trip to the drugstore for eyelashes, eyelash glue, nail-polish, and maybe a new lip gloss. Just to lift the spirits.

Cheers to all women who have to do SO MUCH MORE CRAP THAN MEN to look good. =)

Tri-board Hell

For someone who is supposed to be a creative spirit, I have an unusually high loathing for experimentation and originality. At least when it comes to tri-boards. In a moment of insanity, I agreed to create a tri-board for my advanced Toastmasters group. I agreed to this knowing full well I would sit, stumped, staring at a blank tri-board for days on end, wondering what on earth one does with them to make them appealing.

So here I am, stumped, staring at my Office Depot tri board. In a half-hearted attempt at creativity, I have printed  text from a brochure onto brightly colored paper and placed that on the tri board. In a burst of all out creativity, I then made little Q&A text blocks that, after printing, I cut into funky shapes and scattered across the board. The overall effect is reminiscent of an elementary school teacher's best attempt to make a cheerful board for students while stoned out of her mind on cold medication.

I am so uncreative when it comes to things like this that it's embarrassing. Thank God I don't have kids and can spare my offspring the humiliation of having to bring their lame-o parent-assisted art to class.

I've spent more time on free clip art sites today than I ever care to repeat and still didn't find crap. As far as I can tell, the clip art sites don't actually exist but are instead a linked tunnel of never-ending pop-up messages.

Curses on free clip art and curses on tri-boards. And curses on my warm and generous spirit that made me agree to participate in this monstrosity against good taste in the first place.

Phooey.

Plays Well With Others But Does Not Follow Directions

Here's a question: Do people not read directions or do they read them and then choose just to do whatever they want anyway? I suspect the later...

I'm putting together a tri-board that requires 5x7 photos of members. Instead of having people send me potentially huge image files, I set up a gallery on www.kodakgallery.com and asked them to post their pictures there. I provided step-by-step instructions on how to do this, including giving them the login and password to access the album. The final line of my e-mail asked that they please not send photos to  me as my computer doesn't do well with image files.

How many people do you think e-mailed me their photos directly?

Let's put it this way: more than one. It makes me nuts. In order for them to know I need a photo, they have to have read my e-mail. So WHY are they sending  me photos directly? If they're confused about how to work the gallery, why not e-mail me and say they're confused, versus potentially locking my system with the photo they're sending when I specifically instructed them NOT to send it to me?  I just want to beat my head against a wall and then turn, grab them, and beat theirs. Is it really that difficult?

That's all. Just blowing off a little early morning steam...