Smug Marrieds: Disconnecting

Blair and I have started an experiment where beginning every night at 8, we disconnect from the Internet. No e-mail, no web surfing, no texting. The goal is to gradually move the disconnect time back to where we're spending the majority of our evenings technology free. (Except for TV. We're not giving up TV. Like, ever.) 

We're only a few days in but already seeing positive results. Personally, I feel calmer and more centered. I don't worry about leaping up to check a text or to post something clever on Facebook. My time feels more my own. 

I do find myself frantically checking e-mail or scanning Facebook at 7:45, 7:50 p.m., but it's actually a relief when the clock hits eight. I push back from my desk, turn my phone volume down (we're still accepting calls at this point) and turn the lights out in my office for the evening. 

It's a little scary the pull technology has on me. When a commercial comes on or I finish reading a chapter or we take a break from packing, my instinct is always to go check my phone. And it's a strong instinct, an actual physical urge. I've read that constantly checking e-mail and Twitter and updates provides our bodies with an adrenalin like buzz and I believe it. I really think my body/mind is in a form of detox as we attempt this disconnect. 

The good news is that I'm going to come out stronger on the other side. What the last four days has shown me is that there's just not anything that vital going on at 9 or 10 pm on the Internet that requires my attention. It--whatever that "it" may be--can wait until morning.

Cheers,

Dena 

Going Home

This weekend I drove to Ohio for my aunt's funeral. While it was a sad occasion, I was happy to reconnect with extended family, some of whom I hadn't seen in almost 20 years. 

Since much of my family remains in Dayton and my best friend lives in Cincinnati, I usually drive to Ohio several times a year. And every time I cross the bridge that brings me into Ohio, the one with the great big "Ohio Welcomes You" greeting, I exhale a sigh of relief. I'm home. 

It's interesting. I've lived in North Carolina for 21 years and it's still not home. The people are still a mystery to me, as are some of the sayings, habits and customs. I enjoy returning to Ohio simply because I understand the people and the land with a depth that I'll never achieve in NC, no matter how long I live here.

Driving past farmhouses or brick ranches in tree-lined neighborhoods, I know exactly what the decor looks like inside. I know they keep the Joy kitchen soap underneath the sink with an extra scrubby and that they spare key to the front door is underneath the loose brick in the front flower garden. I know how they wear their hair, where they buy their clothes, what they think is funny and just how far you can go discussing religion or politics. I know the linen closet is most likely a mess and that cans of Campbell's tomato, chicken noodle, and mushroom soup will be in every kitchen, as well as a box of Lipton soup mix which can be transformed into a killer salad dressing. 

I know the importance of high school football, homecoming dances and staying up-to-date on the oil changes and tire rotation for your car. Everyone has chains for their tires in their garage in case of a deep snow and the yard will be mowed by 11 a.m. every Saturday morning without question, thank you very much. 

Catholic is the dominant religion and everyone goes to their festivals whether you're Catholic or not. Casseroles are king and Jello molds with suspended fruit are perfectly acceptable to bring as your offering to a neighborhood picnic. 

I'm always happy to return to North Carolina, but I was thinking on this drive back that still in my mind, North Carolina is where I live. Ohio is home. 

And it's always good to go home. 

Cheers,

Dena