Smug Marrieds: The Devoted Wife

I am a devoted wife. I know this because Chicken Soup For the Soul: Devotional Stories for Wives just accepted one of my stories for inclusion in their book. If only acceptance came with a little "devoted wife" badge I could pull out and show people. 

Remember this blog post?

This is the one where Blair referred to me as a Skeksis from The Dark Crystal. The story I submitted is a slightly modified version. Finally, our love of muppets, Jim Henson and lack of inhibition around referring to each other as beaked, scaly creatures is paying off. 

Once the book comes out, I'm sure I'll be signing all my book copies, Dena - The Devoted Wife.

Cheers.

Back to Blogging: Spa Days

I've been MIA for awhile, with the new house and job keeping me busy. But in truth, I was having trouble coming back to the blog because I'd been gone for so long. Where to start? How to catch everyone up on all the new changes? 

Then today a moment occurred that was so Dena blog-perfect, I knew I'd found my re-entry. Here goes:

I went to a spa today. The kind with soft lighting, herbal tea and O magazine in the waiting room and everyone speaks in hushed tones. I like this spa, but I don't care for the front desk help. Invariably, it's some 25-year old with shellacked hair dressed in all-black size 2 clothing, wearing plum lipstick and looking Botoxed beyond her years. 

There's never a smile (or maybe the Botox prevents it) and there's an almost simmering hostility that shines through, as if how dare I intrude on her day? 

I want more then anything to look at this girl and say, "Honey, you work the reception desk at the place I come to get my pubic hair waxed. Get over yourself."

Oh yeah... I'm back. 

Cheers,

Dena

Cover Reveal for "Does This Collar Make My Butt Look Big?"

Ten Speed Press reworked the cover for my new book and I'm so happy with the result. Here was the original cover:

 And here is the new cover: 

What do you think?